Mother's Day is getting closer, a day I am dreading. They have been hard the last few years when it was just a longing to have a baby. But now, here I am with two daughters I will never know on Earth. It isn't quite how I imagined my first Mother's Day. While I should still be pregnant with my sweet girls, I will instead be visiting them at their grave. It just doesn't seem right, but in all of this, I am trying to choose to be thankful. I am thankful for a wonderful husband who has been my rock. I am thankful for God and His love that gives me strength. I am thankful that my baby girls never knew pain or suffering. I am thankful my mom is still here to celebrate her on Mother's Day (thankful for my dad too). I am thankful for the 5 months I had with my girls and that I was able to feel them moving so early. I am thankful for a friend that will listen at anytime, no matter if it is rational or not. I am thankful I work for a company that has been so understanding with IVF and the loss of the girls. I have much to be thankful for, and on my toughest days I try to remember this. Gentry and Savannah, mommy loves you. Thank you for being my angels.
Well guys, 8 weeks we were matched this time. But now we are back to being a waiting family. I honestly don't know where to start with this one. The last few days have been a whirlwind. On Tuesday (5 days ago) the birth mom texted that she was having contractions and going to the hospital. Being 28 weeks pregnant, I assumed it was Braxton Hicks. Not long after that text, less than hour, our agency called. I assumed they were just telling me the same news. Instead they were telling me they were going to send over the records from the birth mom's last two appointments, but also that there was a note on the records about there being a pregnancy complication related to the baby being at high risk for a lifelong disability/disabilities. The agency said to hold tight until she could get back to the doctor and go under more testing. Less than hour after that called, the birth mom's mom called me and said they couldn't stop contractions and she was dilated 7cm. Baby was com...
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